Ostrich Wrestling!

*This morning I was given an assignment, the assignment was to create my own sport. Here's what I came up with."

Ostrich Wrestling

Ostrich wrestling was invented in 1930, in Africa. It was the first animal wrestling sport invented; really it was made out of a mixture of stress from the war, and boredom.

The origin of ostrich wrestling comes from two men who were angry at each other, but were unfortunately pacifists. They needed a way to get each other, without hitting each other. So they went out on a search to find animals, strong animals, willing to fight.

They considered lions, but they realized that the lions may go after the people, instead of each other. So they continued searching, and they finally found the answer, ostriches. They were big, they were strong, and just what the two men needed. So one man went his way, and the other his way.

They problem was, they were both pacifists, so they didn’t really know how teach the ostriches to fight. During the first round of this “sport” or “competition” if you want to call it that, the ostriches just stood there, looking around.

They tried whipping the, but that just made the ostriches chase after the one who whipped them. Finally, the two men got other men to train the ostriches to fight each other, then the second round came, and well . . . the ostriches did go after each other, for a little while, but then they started going after the men, because they remembered they were the ones who whipped them.

Ostrich wrestling really never took off the ground, and was outlawed after a month of the men trying to get the ostriches to fight. So it was short lived, but one of the men had this to say, “Ouch.”

So ostrich wrestling never became a sport, the two men are still angry at each other to this day, no one knows why they are angry, they just are. Thank you for reading.

*NOTE: NONE OF THE PREVOUS DOCUMENTED CASES YOU JUST READ WERE TRUE. THEY DIDN’T REALLY USE OSTRICHS. THEY USED GIRAFFS. THAT DIDN’T GO TO WELL EITHER AT ALL . . .*

What a great way to start out the new year!

I was truly disturbed when I heard this, 5000 birds just dropping out of the sky, dead. I've done some research on this, and heres what I wrote down:

Bird deaths, Natural, Biblical, or Human?

I’ve been doing some reading on this odd event, and the experts say the whole thing is “natural and it happens all the time, just not in these numbers . . .”

Their explanations are this, fireworks, they crashed into something very large, or some disease. Now I’m going to state all of my opinions on these theories or “explanations”.

First off, let’s start with the fireworks theory. Here’s how it goes; people were setting off fireworks, and having fun. But the fireworks blinded the birds and all of them just flew into buildings, trees, or even planes! All of the birds becoming blinded and flying into buildings, all at once . . . now the problem is, those birds don’t fly at night, and people set off fireworks all of the time on new year’s eve, but 5000 birds didn’t drop dead just because of fireworks, that go off every year! Once again, those birds don’t fly at night, so something would have had to disturb them enough to set them off.

Secondly, flying into to something very large. Their proof for this is, they found signs of head trauma in the birds, so they must of flown into something large. Now, what I think about this is, of course there is going to be trauma, they hit the ground! Another question is, what would of they hit? An alien space ship? A plane? Telephone wires? Or just some large invisible object just floating up there, waiting for the birds to come!

Now thirdly is a disease. I personally believe this is the most possible one, but what disease? It could be anything really! Some type of flu, some type of virus only spread through these types of birds, or just some severe cold. But the thing is, they said they didn’t find any sign of disease! So it’s probably not that either!

My entire point is, nobody knows what really killed these poor little birds. Maybe one day, they decided that they didn’t want to live anymore, so they just stopped living.

Or this truly is a sign that judgment day is coming. Most likely not, but who knows, maybe god is giving us a heads up . . .

Thank you for reading,

Samuel Andrew Paddock, a 12 year old boy who expresses his thoughts a lot.